The gates opened up and A’doces entered, then motioned for me to follow. I saw Heaven, and it was vast. The golden skyscrapers towered over the city. It then occurred to me that I was the only one present at the gates of Heaven, a strange thought, but since people die every minute or so, I assumed that there would be at least eight-thousand people or so waiting in a line. I looked around and saw the golden brick walls that outlined the city had gates roughly every twenty feet. Oddly enough, this is the reason they are called the pearly gates.
I looked around more. A’doces seemed to always be three feet ahead of me, he sort of drifted rather than walked. I noticed that most of the door ways had small crowds blocking them, yet the people who wanted to get through (either in or out) had no problems pushing past the people that crowded the door ways.
After walking about half a mile A’doces stopped in front of a work in progress. “What is this place?” I questioned. A’doces told me that this is where I would be working. “What? Where? You mean actually building on to this structure or inside it?”
“Everybody serves. It builds and structures our society here.” A’doces stated. His smile beamed on. A man who looked as if he would have been rough in the material world came up to us. His features smoothed out by the ethereal realm.
The man spoke, “Just what we need, another one.”
“Another what?” I replied. My confusion was mixed with subtle anger. This puzzled me as I had always thought that Heaven was supposed to be free of any sort stress. He answered, “Another log on the fire.”
Write or wrong, it's still in poor taste.
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
Monday, January 25, 2010
Serving God: Part 2
Thoughts like these littered my mind. I had a particular habit to walk with my head down, and I was doing this as I drew nearer to the gates. I didn’t realize, at first, that I was coming to the gates. In fact, my first sign that I was heading towards them was the shadow cast on the road in front of me.
I looked up, they peaked high in a rounded curve that evened out with the golden brick walls on either side. The gates were narrow, and only took up three feet in the middle of the road. The brick walls filled the rest of the road, but the fog remained constant and I could not see anything further then the road.
“Quite a sight, isn’t it?” A voice said to me. “Yes, it is . . .” I replied as I looked around. Suddenly a winged figure appeared. It was descending down the front of the gates. It’s wing span was twice the length of it’s body! It touched down and I realized that it was not an it, but an angel!
“Are you Michael?” I asked, to which the angel replied, “No. Michael is away on vacation. I am A’doces.”
I nodded, but found that this was the first moment that I realized that I was dead. “Vacation?” I questioned, then continued, “But I thought angel’s only existed to serve.”
“In Heaven, everyone serves.” A’doces stated.
“Well what happens now?” I asked.
A’doces smiled, then said, “You put your love in labour and fully to God’s will.”
I looked up, they peaked high in a rounded curve that evened out with the golden brick walls on either side. The gates were narrow, and only took up three feet in the middle of the road. The brick walls filled the rest of the road, but the fog remained constant and I could not see anything further then the road.
“Quite a sight, isn’t it?” A voice said to me. “Yes, it is . . .” I replied as I looked around. Suddenly a winged figure appeared. It was descending down the front of the gates. It’s wing span was twice the length of it’s body! It touched down and I realized that it was not an it, but an angel!
“Are you Michael?” I asked, to which the angel replied, “No. Michael is away on vacation. I am A’doces.”
I nodded, but found that this was the first moment that I realized that I was dead. “Vacation?” I questioned, then continued, “But I thought angel’s only existed to serve.”
“In Heaven, everyone serves.” A’doces stated.
“Well what happens now?” I asked.
A’doces smiled, then said, “You put your love in labour and fully to God’s will.”
Friday, January 22, 2010
Serving God: Part 1
I can recall sitting in church, learning about God and the kingdom of Heaven. I lived my life, serving God, and standing up for (at the time) what I believed to be the ultimate truth.
I grew old and died. This is obviously what humans do, they are born, and they die. My death wasn’t anything exotic, nor was it heroic. I went to bed. Although I didn’t wake up in my bed, I did wake up on the side of a fog covered road. I stood up. The road seemed to come to a complete end, covered in thick, dense fog to my right. To my left, however, the fog seemed to gradually dissipate and seemed like the most logical for me to follow.
As I walked to my left, the fog did indeed begin to thin out, at least on the road. The sides of the road were still overbearingly foggy and I could see nothing past it. I kept walking.
After what seemed to me to be roughly an hour, I was surprised to find that I did not feel tired! I pondered this as I walked. In life (at least near the end) I could only walk for about twenty minutes before feeling the need for a rest, but here I felt no fatigue! This is the first time I looked at my hands. They were roughly the same as when I had died, yet the wrinkles had smoothed out. The veins that once popped out of my almost translucent skin had now resumed the look of my hands when I was thirty-two! The thought of my hands then made me wonder what my face looked like.
I was resolute to find a mirror when I came across a rest room, however, I then thought about my bladder and bowel control. Before I died, I would be lucky to go two hours before I had to use a toilet. Possibly I had even regained my youthful control that I once had!
I grew old and died. This is obviously what humans do, they are born, and they die. My death wasn’t anything exotic, nor was it heroic. I went to bed. Although I didn’t wake up in my bed, I did wake up on the side of a fog covered road. I stood up. The road seemed to come to a complete end, covered in thick, dense fog to my right. To my left, however, the fog seemed to gradually dissipate and seemed like the most logical for me to follow.
As I walked to my left, the fog did indeed begin to thin out, at least on the road. The sides of the road were still overbearingly foggy and I could see nothing past it. I kept walking.
After what seemed to me to be roughly an hour, I was surprised to find that I did not feel tired! I pondered this as I walked. In life (at least near the end) I could only walk for about twenty minutes before feeling the need for a rest, but here I felt no fatigue! This is the first time I looked at my hands. They were roughly the same as when I had died, yet the wrinkles had smoothed out. The veins that once popped out of my almost translucent skin had now resumed the look of my hands when I was thirty-two! The thought of my hands then made me wonder what my face looked like.
I was resolute to find a mirror when I came across a rest room, however, I then thought about my bladder and bowel control. Before I died, I would be lucky to go two hours before I had to use a toilet. Possibly I had even regained my youthful control that I once had!
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
Celebrity E-Mail: A. Warren Johnson
Good (pick whatever time of day or night it is and insert it here) dear reader,
As you may or may not know, Celebrity E-Mail has been one of my longest running features on my blog, however, some people just don't get what they are all about: Namely I pick on celebrities I find we (collectively) spend way to much time focusing on when we would be better off spending our time possibly finding, oh I don't know, A CURE FOR AIDS OR CANCER? But you know, that's just me.
Thus I was surprised to open my email a few days ago to find a threat (because that's exactly what it was, no matter how nicely worded it may be) from Brittney Murphy's (dead at 32 fame) agency.
I do find this somewhat amusing as I do not have more than 109 fans across facebook and blogger, yet there it was: A warning to stop all Celebrity E-Mails!!! For fear that I may slander Brittney Murphy's great character. However, I found this amusing as well as angering as I was intending my next Celebrity E-Mail to be to Angelina Jolie and her lips!
So instead, I present to you my A. Warren Johnson Celebrity E-Mail (courtesy of Media Talent Group, International Creative Management and BWR).
Dear A. Warren Johnson, (edited for the continuity of Celebrity E-Mail)
We appreciate the humor that you provide (though some of it might be in poor taste) within your feature 'Celebrity E-Mail' on your respective Blogspot account, http://awarrenjohnson.blogspot.com. However, we regret to inform you that one of our clients (Brittney Murphy) has died at the age of 32. Furthermore, we feel that you attack and endanger the reputation and characters of the people in the entertainment industry.
It is with the deepest sympathies that we must ask you to cease and desist any or all future 'Celebrity E-Mail' posts you may wish to place on your Blogspot account, for the future integrity of not only our clients, but also on behalf of clients of other agencies.
We hope that this matter will not have to go any further then this notice. If you have any questions concerning this matter, please feel free to contact us. We sincerely apologize for any or all inconvenience this may have caused.
Media Talent Group
9200 Sunset Boulevard
Suite 810
West Hollywood, CA 90069
Phone: 310-275-7900
David Unger
International Creative Management
10250 Constellation Boulevard
Los Angeles, CA 90067
Phone: 310-550-4000
Holly Shakoor
BWR
9100 Wilshire Boulevard
6th Floor
West Tower
Beverly Hills, CA 90212
Phone: 310-550-7776
After reading this my dear readers, I feel that it would be in my best interest to retire Celebrity E-Mail. At least for the time being. My only regret is that I only was able to write one series of them, I had big plans for it and even though they were hit or miss. I hope that you enjoyed them, and I hope that I one day resurrect this definite light and entertaining venture!
-A. Warren Johnson
As you may or may not know, Celebrity E-Mail has been one of my longest running features on my blog, however, some people just don't get what they are all about: Namely I pick on celebrities I find we (collectively) spend way to much time focusing on when we would be better off spending our time possibly finding, oh I don't know, A CURE FOR AIDS OR CANCER? But you know, that's just me.
Thus I was surprised to open my email a few days ago to find a threat (because that's exactly what it was, no matter how nicely worded it may be) from Brittney Murphy's (dead at 32 fame) agency.
I do find this somewhat amusing as I do not have more than 109 fans across facebook and blogger, yet there it was: A warning to stop all Celebrity E-Mails!!! For fear that I may slander Brittney Murphy's great character. However, I found this amusing as well as angering as I was intending my next Celebrity E-Mail to be to Angelina Jolie and her lips!
So instead, I present to you my A. Warren Johnson Celebrity E-Mail (courtesy of Media Talent Group, International Creative Management and BWR).
Dear A. Warren Johnson, (edited for the continuity of Celebrity E-Mail)
We appreciate the humor that you provide (though some of it might be in poor taste) within your feature 'Celebrity E-Mail' on your respective Blogspot account, http://awarrenjohnson.blogspot.com. However, we regret to inform you that one of our clients (Brittney Murphy) has died at the age of 32. Furthermore, we feel that you attack and endanger the reputation and characters of the people in the entertainment industry.
It is with the deepest sympathies that we must ask you to cease and desist any or all future 'Celebrity E-Mail' posts you may wish to place on your Blogspot account, for the future integrity of not only our clients, but also on behalf of clients of other agencies.
We hope that this matter will not have to go any further then this notice. If you have any questions concerning this matter, please feel free to contact us. We sincerely apologize for any or all inconvenience this may have caused.
Media Talent Group
9200 Sunset Boulevard
Suite 810
West Hollywood, CA 90069
Phone: 310-275-7900
David Unger
International Creative Management
10250 Constellation Boulevard
Los Angeles, CA 90067
Phone: 310-550-4000
Holly Shakoor
BWR
9100 Wilshire Boulevard
6th Floor
West Tower
Beverly Hills, CA 90212
Phone: 310-550-7776
After reading this my dear readers, I feel that it would be in my best interest to retire Celebrity E-Mail. At least for the time being. My only regret is that I only was able to write one series of them, I had big plans for it and even though they were hit or miss. I hope that you enjoyed them, and I hope that I one day resurrect this definite light and entertaining venture!
-A. Warren Johnson
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