Dear Kanye,
Good day Mr. West! My name is A. Warren Johnson. I have recently come to the conclusion that you are the next in line to change the music scene! In the tradition of the Beatles and Korn it is my opinion that you will ruin music next. Now this email is not to inflate your self esteem, I actually have a few questions that have been fluttering around in my head.
My first question for you is how do you deal with being so great? I mean I have a hard enough time just being popular, but you sir, you are great! You are great at seriously everything! Great at being mediocre, great at taking other people's music and making it your own and even great at ruining other people's moments! How do you do it?
Next I was wondering what is the best way that one could possibly reach the level of greatness you have obtained? I have always wanted to be great at something and next to you I feel inadequate next to the enigma that is Kanye West. What is your secret? Please tell me, as I hope to one day be able to stand next to the legend.
Last I have been boggled by the recent events that transpired at the video awards. I have just recently heard about what happened and have been unable to youtube the incident. Did she best you at your own game? Did she woo a lady that you were after? Or did she just write an original song? I don't understand what exactly happened! I mean she is a young country song that would probably never sample a Daft Punk song, so what was your problem with her? I would love an answer to that.
Anyway, I have some chores to attend to, so thank you for taking the time to read this insignificant letter.
Your nobody fan in the great sea of nobodies,
-A. Warren Johnson
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