Together Now

And then again, I find myself driving,
towards those old crossroads
while others race up behind me;
racing up to that red light.

Once I stop & think,
I look past that sign, and this,
only to find myself
wondering . . .
what lies beyond?

////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Turning right
means that I head home.

Alone, once more
with my cigarettes
and to see myself
in the mirror after a shower,

only
       to
           find
                  my
                        faults

and to find that
these colors truly don't run,
but mask themselves in what I call
self.

////////////////////////////////////////////////////

Turning left means taking a trip
down memory lane.

All my failed relationships
with girls I barely knew,
both physically and metaphorically.

All the times I cut a class,
to drink and use
and not think of myself as self,
nor in the moments
in which there
                      memories
                                      lie.

////////////////////////////////////////////////////


Going straight,
almost from the first star
until morning.

Like so many times before,
I find this self to worry,
unlike the one that lays to the left.

////////////////////////////////////////////////////


Behind me is another car,
beside me, one turns off.
Of all the endless possibilities,
I still find myself parked,
and  wondering . . .
what lays beyond that red light.

wed/thru off, pm 8.00 (continued)

These were may days off. Two consecutive evenings spent on shift before being sent home due to it "being too slow." For the four hours I spent at work I made eight dollars in tips, hardly the kind of money needed to  pay bills. The only upside to this situation was that it was slow, and it gave me time to think.

2012 was supposed to be "the future" filled with flying cars, at least according to The Jestsons and 1950s-60s science fiction. The future we got in place of the fantastic was basically a rerun of 1992. The US was pulling out of the east (it took ten years this time around), and the troops that were returning were greeted with almost the same level of civil unrest (although this time without the comfort of knowing they would receive health care or pension).

wed/thur off, pm 8.00

1 L+P
2 p41
3

1 kid milk    Px chz
                     no chives
2 L BP c
    L Rbill Px chz  c
                 no chives
     Beef B+C  just Px chz
                               no chives

w Beef B+C
coke L+P no chives         PS no chives
                   x chz
Ict/w Fett c

Parrot Bay Pine            
                                     1  MR
coffee  12PR fries  c
                     +shrimp
tea D.f+c  B+B p
coke BPR p
DC S.San just  MR  p
                salt

PS Chick Bufflo
MR f.min MR c Champ
1 C.Taco
                          p41
2 Phat w/c

1 pint 
   Pitcher
2
3 W
4 W

8-Bit Memories

My Famicom, replayed
Classic Concentration,
and other stories I remember
from a time unlike today.

Distilled Family Feuds
at some point in the 90s
still has an effect now,
and still they don't talk.


Thank God, I'm a child of
divorce, and pretty much
alone, save for the 3 steps
and 1 half.


I learned to use
my thumbs on my Famicom,
that are now squared from
my phone; a Galaxy Gio (well after Ford).


And still, I am pretty much
alone
with the internet, 
and instant access.


But these thoughts,
they don't really connect,
unless I buy calling cards.


Back in 2010, my GM died,
while years before she
put away her black doll liquor, and also was
alone.


The one I own now requires cards.
Connecting better than my thoughts,
as it replays the late 80s,
and the instant networks assure me
I am less alone.

Seven Point Three

Do you ever think

about the limited scope,

and self-certainty?

The way it follows

or flows in the wood's

white water

surrounded by mountains

higher than a collective knowing

and become uncertain?

The nature walk,

designed to "get away

form it all."

Where the mobile phone

ceases to work,

and all the apps (save for the camera)

cannot connect.

Most conversations

in this case, lack depth.

And once the walk is done

and heading back home,

and finally see the city lights

the realization

everything is natural,

and right where it belongs.